Joseph Patrick Kepferle,
Our oldest son, left us
suddenly on March 5, 2000. Patrick's smile and
charisma lit every room he entered. He was a
natural actor and comedian--intelligent, witty, daring, and
restless. He continually challenged us to
question our complacency and seek greater visions of
what truly could be. Poetic, selfless,
caring, and athletic, he captured the imagination of his
friends, pushed the limits of his world, and injected his
carefree, often irreverent spirit into all facets of our
world.
Like too many other children in this country, our Pat died
in less than 24 hours from a vaccine-preventable killer,
meningococcal meningitis. The summer before Pat started
college, we received information on meningitis
in his college paperwork. It probably said something
about considering a
meningitis vaccination even though there seemed to be
little or no concern about the disease. Nonetheless,
at his pre-college physical and immunization updates,
we asked for the meningitis vaccine. We were told
none was available there, but we were not concerned.
Meningitis was supposedly a "rare" disease,
and the vaccine wasn't on the CDC or state "required"
list. So, we were lulled into a
false sense of security.
When Pat started school, we reminded him to get his
vaccination, and assured him we would cover the cost
of about $70. He promised he'd get the immunization.
But college life was hectic, and it wasn't his
top priority.
Our nightmare began the first Sunday night in March when an
emergency room doctor contacted us. Pat had
been brought in by friends and was extremely sick. The
doctor wasn't sure what Pat had and
mentioned a rash spreading on his body. We
should, he said, come as soon as possible.
We could not fathom what awaited us at the hospital. Pat's
college friends filled the hallway as we rushed
in. When I saw the priest in the critical care unit,
where a nurse finally had taken us, I knew that
things weren't good. Although the team was
still working on him, Pat was gone. The doctors let us
touch his head and tell him how much
we loved him. Our hearts were broken; we had lost our Pat,
the laughter of our hearts. . . .
I have searched my soul for what we could have done to save
our son. The answer seems simple--ensure that he was
vaccinated. But is it? Until weeks after Pat's death I
couldn't even pronounce meningococcal
meningitis, and I didn't understand the issues related
to it, such as the effectiveness or
the limitations of the vaccine. I couldn't
comprehend that a disease primarily associated with
developing countries in Africa could kill a strong,
athletic person like my son here in our country. I believed
in the myth of American medical infallibility.
I didn't realize how many high school and college
students have been maimed or
killed by meningitis until I reached out to other
parents.
Trying to find out why and how I lost my son, I found that
many medical personnel know little about
meningitis and that much of the information provided
to the public is technically accurate but potentially
misleading, downplaying the seriousness of the
disease and underscoring the rarity of complications.
Some health professionals warned that getting
the vaccine would provide a "false sense of security"
since it "only" protected against the A, C, Y,
and W135 strains and not the B serogroup.
Raising awareness among parents and medical professionals
has been challenging. I contend that a shield
against four out of five of the major strains is
better than nothing at all. Fortunately, recent
studies have helped highlight the
dangers in the college environment and the growing
incidence of meningitis among all teens.
The week after Pat died, the Maryland legislature
overwhelmingly passed ground-breaking legislation
requiring incoming Maryland college dorm students to
be vaccinated or sign a waiver declining the
vaccine. Since then, several more states have
passed similar laws, most recently in California.
[Editor's Note: The California law requires that
colleges and universities inform students about meningococcal
vaccine and document that that they have done so.] I have
talked to many parents who have lost children
to meningitis. We want everyone to know the human
impact of this "rare" disease. We all
desperately want other parents to know that the tragedy
we endured could have been prevented.
Pat's laughter is gone, but his presence is all around us.
He and all the other victims compel me to write
again and again that vaccination and education
are the best protection against this killer.
Send Pat a Happy Heavenly Birthday to
Heaven Message
mailto:fmilley@aol.com
Dearest Pat, Today is a special day in Heaven
because it is your Angel Birthday. Your mom and dad miss you so much, but they
have brought honor to your name and your memory and work hard to protect others
from the disease that took you and Ryan a whole life time to early. Happy
Heavenly Birthday beautiful young man. Please give Ryan a hug for us. See you
all soon. Frankie and Bob Milley
Mike and Deb, Pat' parents
work really hard to help in the fight against Meningitis.
Learn more about Legislation on Meningitis
Around the Country and write to Pat's Family
Happy Heavenly Birthday Pat,
I may not know you but I feel as if I do. This is a wonderful day for you and I
know your smiling down on your family and friends. I have a brother up there in
the world of happens and joy of the lord and I know you two would get along
really well. His name is Kenny Fisher so just call his name when you want
someone to talk with our play ball with and he will be there for you and when
you do see him tell him his sister and family send their love. There is also a
very sweet girl there that will make you smile and laugh and her name is
Christen Patterson she my daughters best friend and I know she would love to
have someone to talk with.
Diane
Hines